Ava De Grás

Blurb

All about the book! 

Flourishing, something that we do daily. We grow, we thrive, and we concur, all personally. As if it was a reflection of our lives, or is the reflection, not sure which. Flourishing is astonishing, and when something is astonishing, it is absolutely beautiful! 

Flourishing by Ava De Grás

Chapter 1

Personal Growth by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 1: Personal Growth 

Introduction:

In this chapter we look at the importance of a few crucial parts of personal growth, like mental health, Self-Discipline, Resilience etc.…

If any of these affect you, just know that you are not alone.

Compassion:

Compassion is among many traits of personal growth for me. Knowing me, knowing you, having that superpower of recognizing both yourself and others' suffering to the point where you want to help them and yourself do much better. Having that desire is just so special and important, like having empathy.

Psychology & Philosophy:

On the psychological side of things, I have grown to understand it at a bare minimum level. Before, I never knew that word existed. Psychology, like philosophy, which I also never really fully grown into either, they sound familiar and similar, but unfortunately, from what I understand, they are not quite the same. So please correct me if I am wrong on any of the following…

Psychology is understanding the mind and its behavior. Example: how we react to things.

Philosophy is the understanding of significant knowledge, existence, values, reasons, language, etc. An example would be all the curious questions one might have about any of the following from above.

Samples of questions you may have include:

Why is the grass green?

Why do I even exist?

Did God actually create this world, or is it just a simple myth?

Along with many more questions.

Now, if you have a genuine interest in that, then I would advise looking into it in much greater detail, meaning start researching.

Self-Awareness:

Having self-awareness—knowing your own strengths, weaknesses, what may trigger you to become emotional, and your personal values, what you believe in and not what others think—is important in personal growth.

Growing the mind:

Having a mindset that functions firstly, is what we need. On the other hand, having a mind that's creative like my mindset for example is creative, I'm writing right now and will continue to. Is the most beautiful and empowering gift of personal growth. You don't have to be creative to grow your mind. Being able to talk to yourself is enough, journaling every day or night is even better. I would recommend both but either is good. Like really good. If you're doing that already, I'm proud of you! If you're not, you should start.

Curiosity:

I love this, there's nothing better than being a curious human being, too the point where you are not being too noisy to your neighbour next door. No but seriously, critical thinking, not being brainwashed by things like memes. It's a skill, a knowledge and true experience to desire anything without any real interference of your ego or any ego, now i feel like I'm speaking utter nonsense. As you get older, due to old age, by your early 20s you begin to become curious about life. Example: Save up enough money for a year and go interrailing Europe. It's a life experience and not many get to do it and now I'm curious about it and maybe you are now too.

Curiosity is a very strong personal growth.

It feels our ability to learn and adapt, helping us navigate in a world that's constantly evolving. It encourages us to question, explore, and integrate new knowledge, which is really essential for staying relevant and growing throughout our life.

Resilience:

A word with so many deep meanings. Most importantly how we overcome with grief, tragedy etc...How we adapt to change and do we need help, counselling/therapy? Having resilience is a huge strength, being able to snap out of the darkness and bounce back to present time. One of the most important when it comes to personal growth. Being resilent.

Adaptability:

Can you, my friend, adapt to change, or are we both lost in this world together. If so, don't you worry, I have a cure! If you get yourself into a sticky-icky situation and change gets involved, don't run, don't hide, just embrace it with your superpower, which you didn't know you had until now, (sorry for keeping it from you for so long).

You should embrace the change that is happening in your life right now by doing the following:

Think about it like it's a stepping stone, the next step is gathering ideas on how you can deal with the change that is happing in your life, rather then just resisting it, just go for it! Life is too short my friend. JUST GO FOR IT ALREADY!

Self-Discipline:

Can you set a goal? If so, can you manage and complete this goal? If not, here's how you can adapt to managing this goal. 

Firstly what's your goal? Secondly, set the target date. Thirdly, focus on aiming towards the goal. Nearly there yet? If not, WHY? Did you have enough control? Example: saving money. Dont tell me you went off on a shopping trip with the girls and spent all of your savings, naughty naughty. Having Self-Discipline is having self-awareness, and NOT to overload the shopping with the girls and spend all the savings on clothes, my god. Control, impulse, managing time effectively and sufficiently, maintaining that focus, and importantly putting it into play. That's Self-Discipline and it's important in life. As you grow older, life just starts to come at you for no reason, but for a good reason. So Self-Discipline people!

Perseverance:

Are you showing consistency or do you feel like you have to show consistency to prove yourself to others? Well unfortunately, consistency is a really good thing and you should never ever be ashamed of it, trust me I know all about it. It's like waking up every single day and knowing you just got to make people happy because what else am I doing with my life, you know, but yeah consistency is key to growing. The more you keep growing, the better of a person that you'll be. Trust the process!

Health:

Are you healthy? If so, good on you. If not, why? Now I'm not on about eating healthy, but that you can do. I'm on about are your bones healthy, did you go to your GP/doctor? Are you looking after your body? Are you moving, meaning getting the physical exercises that your beautiful body needs? Or are we lazy? If so, don't be. Health is the key foundation of personal growth, so please mind you. Even just waking up and getting up out of bed (only if you can), do that and I'm proud of you, truly proud. Not many people can, some find it truly hard, especially if mental health comes into play, which is next topic of concern.

Mental Health:

For me this is the most important out of all of them. The darkness is just so cruel. One minute you think your dying the next you feel dead, but realistically speaking, you are quite alright. The question is, are you aware that mental health is affecting you? If it is, there's so many places out there that can help you. Pieta house is one. Talking to a counsellor is another. Having someone you can rely on and talk to is another, like you got a friend in me. Try the, '8-minute' code friended text, so that they know that you are really low. It works! It helps. 

Throwing out this next key crucial part of personal growth: Having Gratitude

Being grateful, to be able to wake up everyday and live life to it's fullest. Example: Travelling, not everyone get's that opportunity, so respect and cherish that. 

Having gratitude towards others, meaning being polite, having manners when for example getting a compliment, "I love your outfit style today", reply back to that by saying "Oh, thank you so much", that's you being grateful to receiving a compliment. Don't just ignore that, cause that's an example of disrespect. 

Gratitude is so important, so please be grateful for everything that life brings you. Life is both, beautiful and precious at the same time. 

Gratitude in relationships and experiences, is such an important lesson. 

The Sound Of Music:

Music in personal growth and how it can impact us everyday, when we listen to that one clever beat, or find that one song that we can really connect to through the lyrics or instrumental, and have it on repeat for hours on end.

Artists out there are just amazing. Self praising myself now. No but seriously, take an artist like Taylor Swift, not because I'm a swiftie, even though I am. Put that aside for a second. Miss Americana has changed millions apong millions of lives, it's mind-boggling and emotional when you think about it. She writes about her own personal experiences, her own personal growth, and as she continues to grow, she will only flourish even more.

Music is, oh my, it's real, it's raw, it's personal, but boy is it both amazing and personal for the artist themselves. It's everything, to some of us.

It's all we have to others. It's the biggest part personally to me and I'm nothing but grateful to have music in my everyday life. I'm grateful music even exists, cause if it didn't where would most of us be with our lives right now. No seriously, where would we actually be?

Think about it for a second, exactly no answer (or is there some kind of answer). 

So music in personal growth is essential for me to say the least. So let's just dance the night away now beacuse music is powerful.

Some versions of music how they impact listeners:

Acoustic Versions - Raw, plain, blended by the guitar, makes the words stand out even more than originals

Acapella Versions - Just the raw solo voice without any instrumental, is really impactful, as you can really grasp how the singer feels. 

Remixes - Remixes just get the party going. So that way you are always out on the dancefloor.

End of chapter Summary:

As I close out this most important chapter about the importance of personal growth. I hope that you as the reader, have learned some valuables, and will continue to grow and flourish in life. It's important, as something in this chapter might have spark your attention, or some parts you may have never known about before (which i can relate too). I honestly hope that you can take something from this, and apply it into your everyday life. 

Personal Growth by Ava De Grás

Chapter 2

Self-discovery by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 2: Self-discovery 

Introduction:

In this chapter we will explore different aspects that life might hit you with. From Unexpected events to Confronting a fear and more. We will then reflect on all, and by then you'll see my story on self-discovery.

An unexpected event:

Okay, so life itself is an unexpected event. Now that might not make any sense too you right now, but there will come a time that it will make perfect sense. To define unexpected events it's that sudden change, an example would be: losing a job, natural disasters, or sudden illness, anything thats disruptive to your routine. Now there's nothing we can do about this, you could, you can build resilience through emergency savings, flexible planning, and maintaining that calm response. Basically, it's not the end of the world if it happens to you. As my Nan always says to me and I quote, "Always have a rainy day fund, and save so much a week", which is a savings account that you never touch, ever, only in case of an emergency. If you don't have one, maybe you should have one. Speaking of that, I need to get onto it. 

A journey or new environment: 

As you grow older, we've all experienced this before. Moving from primary school to secondary school, followed by college. Now they are all different levels of education, you have easy, to getting hit with a book feeling (secondary school), to college, where you are more independent. I can't say much about college cause I haven't gotten that far yet in life, but I'll get there or not. I'll probably just explore the world instead, for all I know, life is too short, and thats a quote you'll hear alot as you get older. Anyways, new environments is change in a way that we all have to face on our own, finding our own personal path. Life!

A mentor or guide: 

A mentor or guide in self-discovery is someone who supports you, who guides you to navigate life. Sorry bad definition. Someone you can go to who helps you peel back layers of uncovering your core values. Something along that line. An example: A counsellor/therapist. They aren't as bad as you think they are. As in, yes they can dive deep into your mind, in a good way now, and so what. Being a counsellor like that is absolutely mind-boggling, crazy.

Confronting a fear: 

Now this one a counsellor can do when youare having a counselling session, they can just dive so deep into your mind. To the point where you are like, woah, okay bud, take a step back, in fact take so many steps back, cause this is too much for me. Fears, confronting a fear, yeah fear is a word everyone tries to escape, especially in a counselling session, believe me, "I've been here!"!

Defining fear, it's an unpleasant emotion that no one likes cause it feels like a threat. It's like that animation movie, "Inside Out", the one with all the emotions that Riley feels inside her head. Yeah fear is very fearful indeed. 

A moment of quiet reflection:

Reflections are important, so to keep all things short and sweet. Self-discovery is always an ongoing thing, there's no limit, you are always exploring to find your true self, finding you. So go you, and remember, as someone once told me, you mind you, and to add, and you find you.

My own self-discovery to this date:

To keep this short and not rant, or make zero sense. There's this place that I call, "My Favourite Place", it's where I did my two year course. It really opened me up to finding my true self. I've grown to be not only stronger, but also more creative. In a way, I'm a musical artist now, so I've released my own music under my artist name, Ava De Grás, and now I'm writing this chapter that's part of a book that I'm going to publish, cause why not, says I. Self-discovery is like personal growth. It's where you a growing, flourishing, to become more better in yourself and with yourself. If it wasn't for my favourite place I'd be hopelessly lost, realistically speaking, from before stepping foot into "my favourite place", I'd be dead right now, so that would mean no book, no music, no to what I've done over the last two years. Just with god, but again I am not dead, so calm down. In conclusion, my favourite place saved my life, from the tutors to the counsellor to all the great friends I've made there. They all saved me, so if you guys are reading this, from the bottom of my heart, thank you. Thank you for just being you. Thank you for being in the most important chapter of my entire life to date. Go raibh maith agat. Slán go fóill! 

Themes of Self-discovery:

What we value to how we overcome are fears to beliefs and so on, are many things I will touch on in lines with the themes in this chapter.

Values & beliefs:

Values and beliefs are what genuinely matters to you, rather than adapting to the values of others.

It's all about you really, and how you explore what life really means to you.

Purpose & meaning with a touch of philosophy:

Do you feel that you have no purpose in life? Well you do. Do you find yourself questioning the question that you want to know the answer, knowing that answer at a deep meaning? Well that's philosophy right there. The actual purpose and meaning of self-discovery is really simple. Are you a passionate person? That's a question I'm asking you, question mark? Did you know that your daily actions have a purpose and a meaning. I know it's a miracle. They all aligne and have a greater sense of personal fulfillment.

So get exploring you, if you haven't started to already!

Overcoming fear:

Is fear your worry or not I don't know. Personally, I despise fear, why? Well really there isn't a why for this, it just is what it is. The question is can you recognize and evaluate, fear? Do you have a fear of being judged? Do you have a fear of the word fear? Me: Yes! Again, I only despise it. It's not fear, it's me. Self analyse people, self analyse, is all I gotta say really. 

Skills:

A great skill to have from my point of view, is knowing the dictionary inside-out, upside-down.

So right now I want to be a dictionary!

I want to be able to have the whole dictionary carved into not just my brain, but my skin.

It's a fantastic skill to have, to just be able to analyse every meaning of every word from a dictionary, and just know it, like damn. 

My skill is unfortunately not being a dictionary, sad day for the parish! But look on the bright side, there's always a pot of gold at the end of a rainbow. Now I think that might be a myth, but whatever. My skill however is being as creatively open-minded as I possibly can, and it's also my ultimate achievement in life. GOALS! Self-discovery in this topic is fun! Nothing but fun, fun, fun!

Reflection of self-discovery:

Confronting and overcoming have different meanings. Confronting is being faced with a challenge, where as overcoming is dealing with that challenge. Just know the difference, cause it can be quite confusing. Overall self-discovery is a crucial part of our lives.

Self-discovery by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 3

Self-Evaluation by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 3: Self-Evaluation

Definition, having that structured process access, so that you can progress on your own initiative. This basically helps you build that self-awareness up, if you were to highlight any achievements in your own life. It can help you guide your future, by shifting it in a way, so that you only flourish even more. So evaluate yourself! 

Highlighting your accomplishments:

Always frame your achievements by using the S.T.A.R method, so that everything is clear:

S - situation 

Assess the challenge that you are being faced with.

T - task 

Carry out details of this goal.

A - action 

Explain all the exact steps that you have taken to address the situation.

R - result 

Share all the positive outcomes.

Note: Try to avoid any of the negative outcomes, they are completely irrelevant.

OR another effective method would be SMART, helps with achieving goals:

S - specific

Make your goal specific, by narrowing it down to be more effective for planning.

M - measurable 

Make sure your goal and progress are measurable.

A - achievable 

Make sure you can reach that goal and accomplish it within reason. As if there's a certain time frame. 

R - relevant 

Your goals should align with your values and long-term objectives.

T - time

Set a realistic end date, one where you're not rushing. 

You can always identify areas where there is room for improvement. It can really help! 

Self-Evaluation by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 4

Building Healthy Habits by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 4: Building Healthy habits 

Building healthy habits is all about rewiring yourself, in other words it's a step-by-step process. 

Eating healthier by having a fruit instead of having a bar of chocolate. I'm guilty for this. Exercising regularly by taking regular walks. Getting the right amount of sleep that our beautiful body needs, and not be doom-scrolling, which majority of us are guilty for doing so.

There are many key strategies to make habits actually stick, some include the following:

1. Focusing on the 21/90 Rule: A rule I just found out about. It generally takes about 21 days to form a new routine, and then up to 90 days for it to just stick permanently, for it to be your lifestyle change. If you do try this, be patient with yourself during this adjustment period.

2. Tracking your progress: You can do so by using a calendar or a tracker app to check off your days. This way it builds that motivation to strive and aim for that goal you want. 

3. Start ridiculously small: Instead of committing to an hour of daily exercise, just start with a simple 10-minute walk. Then when you feel comfortable, you can gradually increase it and push yourself to new heights.

Building Healthy Habits by Ava De Grás

Chapter 5

Mindfulness and Presence by Ava De Grás

Chapter 5: Mindfulness and Presence 

Mindfulness is being aware of current moments, intentionally and without any distraction or judgement. 

Presence is that deeper feeling of being at the very end, having achieving something with greater importance. It's basically the state of 'being here now'.

Together they both transform into this scattered attention, with that deeper connection amd emotional regulation. 

Their core concepts:

Look at Mindfulness as if it's, 'The Action'. It's being in the present moment, the what's happening right now moment. Focusing on observing your thoughts, breath, and body without getting swept away by them.

Presence on the other hand is, 'The State'. 

The concept of being in the deeper, much quieter space that you step into when the internal voice interferes. It's the state of being in that peace. 

Together they just allow you to step off 'autopilot'. 

How to cultivate Mindful Presence:

You can do a breathing exercise. Breath in for 4, then hold for 4. Exhale for 4, then hold for another 4. Repeat that pattern, continously. It really helps you stay on track! I always use this breathing exercise, especially when I become overwhelmed or anxious. Now there are other ways, but that's the most realistic way.

Mindfulness and Presence by Ava De Grás

Chapter 6

Self-Compassion by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 6: Self-Compassion 

Self-Compassion is treating yourself with kindness, care, and understanding. So being positive, instead of being negative towards yourself. 

Psychology is really fun to dive into. It's actually really interesting. Psychology in self-compassion has three core components. Those are as follows: 

1. Self-Kindness vs. Self-Judgement: 

Rather than attacking yourself with harsh inner judgement, offer yourself warmth when you fail. Always being actively soothing to your own distress, is beneficial. 

2. Common Humanity vs. Isolation: 

Isolation is an oucher. Especially when you always isolate yourself from others. I'm guilty for this. Recognizing imperfection, suffering, and any possible mistakes, are completely normal in human error. It's all about experiences in life. If that makes any kind of sense. 

3. Mindfulness vs. Over-Identification: 

Observing all the negative emotions with non-judgemental awareness, means acknowledging all your pain without suppressing it or letting it get to you. Once it get's to you, you are screwed my friend. Ah no, you'll be absolutely the solid finest. Just don't let it go that far! 

This is all science. Psychology is science, well apart of science. So, why all of the above really matter:

1. It helps with decreasing that stress. It lowers the level of cortisol, which is the stress hormone. It has a higher production of oxytocin, which is the soothing hormone.

2. It has the greatest resilience. That can activate the brain's "soothe system", helping you bounce back from all your failures faster, instead of spiraling into shame or avoidance. 

3. It enhances all that motivation. Being self-compassionate makes you take those risks more willingly. 

So having self-compassion is important!

Self-Compassion by Ava De Grás

Chapter 7

The Human Mind by Ava De Grás 

Chapter 7: The Human Mind 

The human mind is literally what keeps us together. It's what helps us to think, holds are memory, controls are emotions, enables are consciousnes, and judgement. It's a state of mind, our minds! 

The minds core components are as follows:

Consciousness & Awareness: 

It's the state of being aware, alerted, and awake to what surrounds you and the internal existence. It forms that sort of subjective universe, like a real private universe that others can never fully access directly or see within. 

Cognition:

Is the intellectual process that allows us to learn, helps us pay attention, use critical thinking to solve problems, gives us reason and retain facts through memory.

Emotion & motivation:

The feelings and that desire on what we thrive off of are human behaviour. Through shaping our personal reality and giving that meaning of value to life experiences.

The Unconscious:

The mental process, such as hidden biases, automatic reflexes, and implicit memories. All of these influences our actions without even requiring the sub conscious awareness. 

The human mind is exceptionally powerful.

To be continued….